Trogging

There are two good things about trogging (trampoline jogging, and yes, I made that word up): first, it gets you in shape. Second, it sounds like something naked British people would do together. So that's awesome.

Also awesome is the fact that it's easy to do in front of the TV. I used to have a rule that I couldn't watch anything from Netflix unless I was trogging. It worked; I was a total fox and everyone wanted to have sex with me. Then we moved the TV downstairs (which has too low a ceiling for trogging) and I got squishy again.

Trogging is good for those who would like to be joggers, but have joint problems or just hate the sound of their feet slapping on the pavement (that's me--the sound makes me feel tired, and I just find the jarring sensation annoying). Trogging is a lot kinder to the feet and joints, though I suppose it's not a good idea if you have severe ankle or knee problems, especially since your ankles keep you stabilized and in the upright position (as in ice skating, weak ankles can be bad in trogging). The trampoline is bouncy, of course, in a way that sidewalks and treadmills aren't, and for that reason I find trogging to be much more pleasant and safe than its more natural alternative.

It doesn't take much to get started, either. Trampoline, running shoes, and a sports bra are really all you need (sports bra optional for men).

There are two steps to trogging:
1. Get one of these or something like it.*
2. Trog.

It's easy to cheat. It's easy to just kind of barely move your feet in a manner that means it will take you ten hours to burn four calories. I make sure I've got good, fast music on, and I make sure I'm jogging to the beat to avoid cheating. I do that for half an hour. Or I watch something long (like a Netflix movie) and then it doesn't matter if I'm cheating--I just keep on keepin' on until I about fall off the trampoline.

If you enjoy feeling as if you are going to die, you can try trogging with high knees for a while. I usually do this for about thirty seconds before my abdomen is on fire. The game, then, is to do high knees every time I hit a refrain. So when Ashlee Simpson** is all "Whatcha been doin, whatcha been doin," I take it easy. Then when she's suddenly like "Heyhowlongtilthemusicdrownsyououtdon'tputwordsupinmymouthIdidn'tstealyourboyfriend" then I gotta hit it with the high knees. And it hurts. But ... it's GOOD.

Other trogging options: bouncing without bending knees (for calves), jumping jacks, hit-your-butt-with-your-own-heels, and so on. It's surprising how tiring one activity will be for your abs, another for your calves, etc. Experiment. Then enjoy your hotness.
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*Some of these trampolines are really expensive, which I find kind of ridiculous. These days an "urban rebounder" (uh, little trampoline, in other words) can cost upward of $250. Honestly, I think my trampoline was $12 on sale. It may not be a 40" ... may be a little smaller ... but it really doesn't matter. It works fine.
**Yes, I listen to Ashlee Simpson while exercising. And Britney Spears. And Justin Timberlake. And Hilary Duff. There's just something about much-hated pop music that keeps the feet going. But I don't just listen to teen queens--Kanye West's "Jesus Walks" is a great exercise song.

The folk archive at 3Hive

I love 3hive.com. Free music. Free WEIRD music. And I like free weird music.

I spend most of my time in the folk archive. Right now, I can't stop listening to Ian Love's "The Only Night." (Available for free download on 3hive.) It's a beautiful song, and proof that just because it ain't on the radio, that doesn't mean it ain't good.

Little Wishes

This is a great way to do something special for a needy child this holiday season. I think this site is awesome--it's so easy to give.

(I originally found this over at Cubbiegirl's. Cubbiegirl foster-adopted a nine-year-old and knows firsthand how little these kids get for Christmas.)

It's so hard for me to look at these wishes and know that I'm only going to be able to grant one or two of them. If you can, please help.

Mortal Kombat video

Click to view a homemade Mortal Kombat Theme video in a new window.

I'm not saying this is hilarious all the way through, or that it doesn't have its weak moments, but I applaud any two young men who take the time to choreograph their own Mortal Kombat video, complete with bitten-off heads and the lightning ray. Come on, you gotta respect that, even if the part where the guy is just moving his tongue back and forth is a little odd. Still, how can you not laugh at their version of Sonja?

This is one of those times where I out myself as being A) kind of a geek and B) about nine years past my teenaged prime. But I admit it: not only did this video make me laugh, I also fondly remember Sonja and the gang. My friends and I used to play Mortal Kombat all the time in high school.

My favorite move was where that one guy would throw out a fish hook, spear the other person, and drag them over to him, saying "GET OVER HERE!" in a very authoritative, I've-got-a-fish-hook-in-you-so-you-better-listen voice. Then ... when the victim was dragged as close as possible ... then came the upper cut.

This is proof that older people (yes, even at 25 I am an older person, especially when it comes to video games) just naturally like to talk about how the world is going to hell in a handbasket. Here I sit, grouching about how games like GTA are totally screwing kids up (although GTA is a great adult game--I just think the ratings system should be USED by parents), and then I remember that I used to stick fish hooks in people on a daily basis at the age of fourteen.